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Saturday, April 9, 2016

If At Birth You Don't Succeed (A Memoir)


Pro: Hilarious.
Con: Only if you don't like to laugh. In which case I worry for you.

The Bottom Line: I recommended this book at work before I was even halfway through – and I wanted to write this review then too because I was having such a great time.

The first time I'd ever heard of/saw Zach Anner, he was dressed in a suit and leading around another man in fishnet tights, handcuffs, and a gag. The group he was with all intended to see Fifty Shades of Grey in full Fifty Shades garb. Several men I was already familiar with, including Josh Flanagan, Aaron Marquis, and Chris Demaris (which now sort of makes them like the sex dungeon Three Musketeerm, and, sorry Chris, but I'm pretty sure you're D'Artagnan). I will admit I'm an avid Rooster Teeth fan, so I didn't have any idea who Zach was, aside from their friend. I was amused, and then moved on with life.

It wasn't until about 7 months later Zach appeared in a series RT was doing called Buff Buddies. And that's when I discovered just how freaking funny Zach is. So when I heard he had a book coming out, I signed myself up. Not that there's anything I had to actually sign up for. Though I did have to order in the books myself because someone upstairs is a moron and didn't order any for my store. YOU DON'T OWN ME, BUYER PERSON.

I'm sorry, I'm getting off track.

Zach Anner is, at this point, an internet celebrity. Born with cerebral palsy (the sexiest of palsies, I feel I ought to add), he's made his way through the world despite some rough times, but shows that with a solid attitude and the help of friends and family, you don't have to let a disability define you.

The book is divided up into separate parts with a few chapters within each part. Though ultimately a memoir, it doesn't necessarily read in chorological order. This isn't a "I was born, here's my childhood, here are the obstacles, here's me into adulthood, yadda yadda" autobiography. Rather, it's a series of stories from Zach's life, some slightly more serious than others, but each one showcasing an important point in his life, from hosting his own show on Oprah's TV channel to discovering the kind of person he is or wants to be.

All throughout the book Zach's injected his humor and wit, and it's all so well done that quite frequently people would look over at me while I sat there and giggled at something on the page. I actually tried to take my time with this book so I wouldn't finish it too fast. I managed to stretch it out to about four days – here's hoping Zach does indeed plan to write another one at some point because he's got some excellent stories.

You also learn a lot of interesting things about walks of life most of us never experience. How they treat you on a reality TV show. What it's like to be disabled while on a reality show. What it's like when things go wrong because the European outlets fried your wheelchair battery. Or the simple fact that just because you're disabled doesn't mean you can't still do a lot of cool stuff. Zach's traveled to a lot of great places, from Disneyland to Berlin to Canada, and here I am with a fully functioning body and I've never even been out of the country.

But it's not all sunshine and roses. Zach lets readers in on some of his less than perky moments, such as an incident involving razors (trust me, not in the way you think), or when he hit a low point and decided to go on random trip to anywhere just to get away and see something different and it completely failed on him. Still, he imbues these things with what he's learned, so that we might in turn learn from him.

Whether you end up loving this book for it's hilarity, inspiration, writing, or all of the above, it's definitely worth a read. And if you don't know who Zach Anner is, trust me, after this you're going to want to find out.

NT

P.S. Dr. Phil is a dick. Though I feel this should surprise no one.

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