If At Birth You Don't Succeed (A Memoir)

Pro: Hilarious.
Con: Only if you don't like to laugh. In which case I worry for you.

The Bottom Line: I recommended this book at work before I was even halfway through – and I wanted to write this review then too because I was having such a great time.

The first time I'd ever heard of/saw Zach Anner, he was dressed in a suit and leading around another man in fishnet tights, handcuffs, and a gag. The group he was with all intended to see Fifty Shades of Grey in full Fifty Shades garb. Several men I was already familiar with, including Josh Flanagan, Aaron Marquis, and Chris Demaris (which now sort of makes them like the sex dungeon Three Musketeerm, and, sorry Chris, but I'm pretty sure you're D'Artagnan). I will admit I'm an avid Rooster Teeth fan, so I didn't have any idea who Zach was, aside from their friend. I was amused, and then moved on with life.

It wasn't until about 7 months later Zach appeared in a series RT was doing called Buff Buddies. And that's when I discovered just how freaking funny Zach is. So when I heard he had a book coming out, I signed myself up. Not that there's anything I had to actually sign up for. Though I did have to order in the books myself because someone upstairs is a moron and didn't order any for my store. YOU DON'T OWN ME, BUYER PERSON.

I'm sorry, I'm getting off track.

Zach Anner is, at this point, an internet celebrity. Born with cerebral palsy (the sexiest of palsies, I feel I ought to add), he's made his way through the world despite some rough times, but shows that with a solid attitude and the help of friends and family, you don't have to let a disability define you.

The book is divided up into separate parts with a few chapters within each part. Though ultimately a memoir, it doesn't necessarily read in chorological order. This isn't a "I was born, here's my childhood, here are the obstacles, here's me into adulthood, yadda yadda" autobiography. Rather, it's a series of stories from Zach's life, some slightly more serious than others, but each one showcasing an important point in his life, from hosting his own show on Oprah's TV channel to discovering the kind of person he is or wants to be.

All throughout the book Zach's injected his humor and wit, and it's all so well done that quite frequently people would look over at me while I sat there and giggled at something on the page. I actually tried to take my time with this book so I wouldn't finish it too fast. I managed to stretch it out to about four days – here's hoping Zach does indeed plan to write another one at some point because he's got some excellent stories.

You also learn a lot of interesting things about walks of life most of us never experience. How they treat you on a reality TV show. What it's like to be disabled while on a reality show. What it's like when things go wrong because the European outlets fried your wheelchair battery. Or the simple fact that just because you're disabled doesn't mean you can't still do a lot of cool stuff. Zach's traveled to a lot of great places, from Disneyland to Berlin to Canada, and here I am with a fully functioning body and I've never even been out of the country.

But it's not all sunshine and roses. Zach lets readers in on some of his less than perky moments, such as an incident involving razors (trust me, not in the way you think), or when he hit a low point and decided to go on random trip to anywhere just to get away and see something different and it completely failed on him. Still, he imbues these things with what he's learned, so that we might in turn learn from him.

Whether you end up loving this book for it's hilarity, inspiration, writing, or all of the above, it's definitely worth a read. And if you don't know who Zach Anner is, trust me, after this you're going to want to find out.

NT

P.S. Dr. Phil is a dick. Though I feel this should surprise no one.

The Wilder Life by Wendy McClure - Little Houses Everywhere

Pros: Fun and educational for fans of the Little House books
Cons: Not as much fun if you've never read the books

The Bottom Line: If you loved Laura Ingalls Wilder and her Little House books (like me!), then you'll get a kick out of one woman's journey to see it all.

When we got The Wilder Life by Wendy McClure as an ARC a while back, I had to read it. The premise was just too good to pass up.  I loved the Little House books. When I was a kid, I saved up all my money and spend a whopping $6 to get my hands on the next book. I still have those books too. My favorite is On the Banks of Plum Creek.

But McClure wanted to take things a step further. When she rediscovered her old Little House books as an adult (yep, she still had her books from when she was a kid too), she decided to go on a bit of a Laura Ingalls Wilder adventure. She wants to actually find the Big Woods where Pa's cabin was. She wants to follow the trails in the prairie lands and wade in the one and only Plum Creek (beware of leeches!). She wants to immerse herself in what she calls "Laura World" and pick out the truth of the books from the fiction that everyone so loves. Heck, she even makes butter with a butter churn (apparently not as hard as it sounds - I was shocked) and that molasses candy in squiggly shapes using just a pan of snow.

If you have read the Little House books, McClure will remind of you of all the little things in them. I just started and was only on page 4 when she reaches out to the reader and says, "...because you do remember the button lamp, in the saucer, with the little square of calico that [Ma] twists up and greases into a wick?" Now, I haven't read the books literally in decades, but that was my very first Laura Ingalls Wilder flashback moment, in which I internally shouted, "Omg, yes! I do!"

This book brought back a whole bunch of those memories. Even better, McClure tries out all sorts of things, such as making a bunch of food from the books like salt pork and vanity cakes. Yeah. Who remembers the vanity cakes? Remember how awesome they sounded in the books? Apparently they're made using two pounds of lard. Ha!

It was really fun to follow her around as she sought out the places where Laura and her family lived. If you aren't a super-Laura buff, then you'll also learn all sorts of interesting tidbits and truths about the family, such as Pa and everyone skipping town one night to avoid paying rent they couldn't afford. If you don't want to leave Laura World, that magical fantastical place, then don't read this book and you'll stay there. But if you've long since left it, you'll enjoy every page. McClure reads all sorts of other books and accounts, both by Laura and her daughter Rose, as well as by other historicists and such.

I left Laura World a while ago - long before Ms. McClure. I distinctly remember when driving home from Colorado one year through South Dakota when my father saw a sign announcing that Laura Ingalls Wilder's home was coming up so turn off if you wanted to check it out. The thing that actually strikes me now is that my dad somehow remembered that I liked the books and asked me if I wanted to go see it (this is the man that can't remember my birthday and once a year for several years in a row was always surprised when I said I liked to fish). I remember looking at the sign, smiling a little, and saying, "No, that's okay. I'm good." (Though I think now it would have been nifty to look at from a historical perspective.)

The only issue with this book is if you haven't read the Little House series. This book isn't about the television show (in case you haven't figured that out yet), so that won't help you in the least. My mom read this book before me and she said it was fun, funny, and interesting, but she'd never actually read the books so she wasn't always sure what McClure was talking about. She couldn't relate to her story the way I could. So maybe read the Little House series first, eh? They're a lot of fun anyway!

One last thing is that I think McClure's hubby deserves some kudos for how supportive he is when it comes to his wife's little obsession (hey, if you go and buy and actual butter churn to churn butter, while that's pretty cool, I do think it borders on obsession. And by the way folks - churned butter tastes the same as regular grocery store butter, so don't spend extra money on magical handmade butter because it's nothing special - unless whoever is making it has cows eating actual grass...or if it comes from Ireland...). He also provides some extra amusement to the story, so high-five to Chris.

It's a delightful little story that's relatively quick to get through. You'll have a great time reading it and remembering a bit of your childhood. McClure's favorite was Little House on the Pairie, but my favorites are On the Banks of Plum Creek, Little House in the Big Woods, and yes, Farmer Boy.

All's well that ends well!

NT

Originally posted on Epinions.com

 Notes from the playlist: "Waking Dream" by Natalie Walker

Purchased for My Shelf

If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor by Bruce Campbell

Actually not so much purchased for myself so much as received as a gift for my shelf. And no, not as a gag gift. I've been curious about this book ever since I first saw it, oh, years ago. Since Bruce Campbell showed up as a slightly more serious act in Burn Notice, my favorite show since I-don't-know-when, I've been even more eager to read it. Bruce has had an interesting life, I'm sure, and he's a hilarious guy - not that I know him personally or anything. But you'd have to be a certain kind of ridiculous to willingly go into movies that are so, well, ridiculous that everyone loves you for them. If you don't know who this guy is, that's okay. He's a bit of a cult classic himself (I recommend starting with Army of Darkness and going from there). My father and I will watch absolutely horrendous movies if he's in them. I look forward to cracking this open and finding out what's behind the man who can get women into bed by saying, "Gimme some sugar baby." I don't doubt that I will be, at times, cracking up as well.


Notes from the playlist: "Gives You Hell" by The All-American Rejects

Recommended for Everyone

The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank

It's a piece of history. It's a look at the past in a very special way. Anne Frank, her family, and another family they knew were Jewish. They hid from the Nazis thanks to some of their friends. This is a look at Anne's life during that time, closed up away from the world, wondering when she'll ever be safe, ever live in a normal world again. It's not a happy story. It simply ends with one final entry. She and her family were found out and sent to the concentration camps. Anne never made it out. Only her father did. Anne hoped to be a great writer when she grew up. It's a shame it had to happen this way.


Notes from the playlist: "Magic" by Mick Smiley

Recommended So People Never Forget

Night by Elie Wiesel

This is one book that everyone should read if they've never read The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank. And then you should read that too. Night is a true story, experienced by Elie Wiesel, about the horrors of enduring the holocaust. In 1944, he and his family were taken to the now infamous concentration camp at Auschwitz. It's a short, gripping story. Elie watches his family die and tries to understand the evils that man is capable of, all while doing everything in his power to survive. Not only does Elie offer the events of that horrific time, but also posits questions and thoughts that will have you thinking, wondering, and perhaps delivering insight you've never had before. If you want something real and powerful, this is it.

Notes from the playlist: "Psychological Recovery...6 Months" by Hans Zimmer

Recommended for People Searching for Hope

703: How I Lost More Than a Quarter Ton and Gained a Life by Nancy Makin

This was a book a customer was searching for. She found it, but I remember seeing her put it back. Intrigued, I took a look myself and made a mental note: Read. In case you missed it, this has been in my Reading List off to the left for quite some time.

I finally got to it (and while reading it, it caught the interest of one of my managers as well). It's a fascinating story that will make you angry, make you smile, and yes, even perhaps shed a tear or two. I know, that all sounds awfully cliche, but it's true. When my manager asked how the book was going, I told her I'd finished it. Was it worth reading? Emphatic "Yes" on my part. Honest to heavens, if you're running out of hope for whatever reason, read this book. Understand that it's not impossible to love life again and escape from whatever dark prison you or others have managed to build around you. This book is actually in the Health/Diets section of our store, but it really can give you a boost no matter what you weigh.

Notes from the playlist: "When She Loved Me" by Sarah McLachlan

Recommended for UFC Fans, MMA Practicioners, and Humor

Got Fight? by Forrest Griffin

Want to learn about MMA (among other things) from Forrest Griffin? Then read this and laugh your ass off in the process.

No joke. Forrest Griffin's book is full of fighting advice, moves, tips, and freaking hilarious anecdotes and smart ass writing that is guarenteed to have you laughing, learning something, or possibly even both. The second I finished this book, I stuck it up on the recommendation shelf. If anyone is looking at it or asking about it, I handsell it like there is no tomorrow. Yes Forrest, I'm one of those 3 (or 2 I believe you knocked it down to) girls that actually read your book. We had to order them in batches to make sure we had 10 in the store at any given time. When the book came out, we only had 4 to start with.

Read the Epinions review here!


Notes from the playlist: "Scream" by Avenged Sevenfold

Just Finished (and Highly Recommended)

Voluntary Madness by Norah Vincent

I'd already read Self-Made Man and in that book Norah Vincent mentions that all her work had led her to a bit of a breakdown. She then visited an institution, and after only 4 days, realized what her next project had to be. It became this book, in which she visits three different mental institutions; public, private, and altnerative medicine, and reveals to readers what she finds. Her discoveries are incredibly engrossing. It was hard to stop reading. She also lends her thoughts and even gives us a very candid look into her own mental health and issues. Though she said she set out to show that the system was broken, she realized many different things, that blame lies with more than one person, and that there are ways to heal - it's just a very difficult path.


Notes from the playlist: "Macedonian Morning" by Bill Whelan

Recommended for Culture, Human Interest, and Biography Buffs

Self-Made Man by Norah Vincent


I was zoning (read: orgainizing) the biography section in the store one day and came upon this book. A lot of times, that's how we booksellers get sucked into books. Something looks interesting and we pick it up and before we know it, we're adding it to our mental list of "Books I Need To Read." Nevermind that the list is already hundreds of books long (most of which we eventually forget about at some point). But this one I did finally read and found to be thoroughly interesting. Norah Vincent conjures up a convincing man-counterpart (from the walk to the talk to the fake cash and prizes in the pants). From there she goes on a journey, slipping into man-saturated areas of life: bowling alleys, strip joints, door-to-door salesmen, and even a monastary. For over a year and a half she was Ned, experiencing life as a man, even dating women to see what it was like on the other side. Within her writings, she tries not to make too many assumptions, or at least, press her opinions on anyone, but rather does her best to report what she discovers within the world of men.

A real eye-opener and a fascinating read for both men and women, her experience eventually led to a minor breakdown, which led to the inspiration (if one could call it that) for her next book, Voluntary Madness, a book that is, of course, on my mental reading list. Except this one is near the top so it doesn't get lost.


Notes from the playlist: "Bonebreaker" by Infidel Incorportated

Recommended for College Goers and NOT the Faint of Heart

I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell by Tucker Max

I know. I've just gone from beginning with highly intelligent to completely ridiculous. Tucker Max is the infamous rich kid who screws around with his life, friends, women, and tempts fate, booze, and the limits of, well, just about everything. Women decry Tucker Max as a chauvinist pig, a cheating manwhore who doesn't deserve anyone's praise. Yes, he is. In fact, he acknowledges this and frequently reminds the reader of how much of a jerk he really is. With or without the book, Tucker Max doesn't need the money, but this book is just so damn funny, you quit caring about the tiny percentage he gets when you purchase it.

Frankly, I believe that Tucker Max is proof that karma exists in the world. No one, and I mean NO ONE will ever have some of the negative things happen to them the way they happen to Tucker Max. It just wouldn't. Trust me. In short; it's vulgar, crass, sickening, includes sex, drunkeness, insults, and a lot of messed up stuff, but if you don't have a problem with any of that, read this. Trust me, you won't be sorry.

Read the Epinions review here!


Notes from the playlist: "You're the One" by Rev Theory